While I was waiting for a train at Brighton Beach yesterday morning, there was a bulldozer doing its thing nearby. I stood there watching it ferrying loads of dirt from one pile to the other. I was pondering if someone could make a mint of money by setting up a quarry somewhere, and letting blokes discover their masculinity by paying to drive a bulldozer around in the mud for a couple of hours.

The driver paused and shouted out of the window at me: “Do you need any clay at home?”

I laughed. “No”, I replied, “Got plenty.”

He grinned and kept going.

(And it’s true. Andy, who does my gardening for me, reckons there’s some clay in the back garden, giving the grass a hard time.)

Thoughts on the free Melbourne Tourist Shuttle bus service:

Despite the name, it’s not a shuttle, it’s quite clearly a loop.

I was going to say that unlike the (also free) City Circle tram, every bus I see go past is empty. But it’s not true: I saw one last week that had about 10 people on it.

It’s funded by money from the State Government car-parking levy, which was meant to pay for “urban and transport improvements in the CBD”. Yet it doesn’t help commuters by giving them an alternative to driving in, nor does it do anything for traffic congestion and overcrowded public transport services.

While some tourists might get something out of it, it’s not taking them anywhere they can’t get to by tram, and overall I still think it’s a waste of the $750K per year it costs.

The good

We had a low-key but enjoyable celebration of Marita’s birthday on Saturday. In doing so I discovered that both our suburbs are host to dog-related cafes — the Dancing Dog in Footscray, and the Spotted Dog in Bentleigh. And both do a very fine meal.

The bulk of the rest of the weekend was spent lazing, relaxing, that kind of thing. Just the way a weekend should be.

The bad

My tipping was up the creek — only 2 out of the possible 6 games this weekend tipped. As much as I’d like to think I’m reasonable at tipping, after the 8 out of 8 two weeks ago, and the occasional win of an annual competition, basically it’s all fluke.

Then there was the mission to buy a ladder. (No, not a footy ladder.)

I worked out that what I needed was a 2.1 metre single-sided ladder (yeah, they still follow imperial measurements and come in 30cm/1 foot increments). 1.8m would be too short to safely and easily get myself through the trapdoor in the ceiling to relight the heating/leave rat poison for my visitors. 2.4m would be too big to easily manoevre the ladder down the hallway and into position. 2.1m would be perfect.

Having determined that the fine ladder maker Bailey makes such a thing, and having equipped myself with my sister’s car complete with roofrack and ties to bring home such a product, do you think I could find one? Nope. Bunnings may have 10 different types of mouse trap*, but they don’t have a 2.1 metre single-sided ladder. In fact I visited two branches, and was out of luck each time. Neither did Penhalluriacks.

To add insult to injury, I didn’t have convenient change for the sausage sizzle at Bunnings Moorabbin, either. Sometimes they’re commercial outfits, but this was the real deal, run by a kindergarten for fundraising. Oh well.

Happily the Bailey web site can tell you what shops have ordered a particular model in the last 3 months, which gives me a few good leads for the next installment of the hunt.

*Or they may not. I’m really just speculating.

The ugly

I happened to walk around the back side of Bentleigh tonight. It’s pretty euch back there, with darkened, ugly car parks, which probably occupy more space than the entire area of shops on main road. I suppose every suburb has something like this tucked away, a consequence of our car dependence. But it ain’t pretty.

Update 29/6/2006. Google maps have updated their satellite images for the area, so now you can see it from above. This is Centre Road between the railway station and Jasper Road:

(Click to see it in Google Maps.)

I’m guessing the drought is still on, because there doesn’t seem to have been much rain recently. (Today being an exception.) Obviously the impact in rural areas is a big problem, but what does it mean in urban areas?

Water restrictions will keep going. No bad thing. I can’t believe until recently people used to wash down their driveways. What a waste.

But what about the garden? I’m glad my garden is mostly native bushes that don’t need much water, but the grass is suffering. Jeremy’s bathwater goes on it sometimes though.

Fairly reliable weather forecasts mean you rarely need to leave the house with an umbrella or a raincoat unnecessarily.

Walking (and therefore PT use) and cycling are more attractive, on most days. After all, nobody wants to get drenched just going out.

The washing can dry outside. Don’t usually need to use the dryer, or make space inside for endless numbers of clothes horses… although the air in winter is so moist, most things do end up drying inside a bit.

Walk The Line — The story of Johnny Cash, and in particular his drug addiction and relationship with June Carter, based on his autobiography, which doesn’t paint him in entirely a good light. Interesting to see where some of his better-known songs, such as Folsom Prison Blues, and Walk The Line, come from. Really good. Not surprised it won an Oscar.

A City Lost And Found - Whelan The Wrecker’s Melbourne — I certainly remember seeing Whelan The Wrecker signs around Melbourne when I was growing up, letting the passing populace know that another building was being flattened. They don’t exist anymore as a family firm, though the brand name was bought. The book covers their century-long history, and with it the history of many of Melbourne’s best-known buildings of the past and present, with plenty of anecdotes along the way. A fascinating book for anybody interested in Melbourne’s history.

• State Library: Whelan the Wrecker, with Robyn Annear talking about how she wrote the book.
• Museum of Victoria: Whelan the Wrecker

You might think you’re the customer at the supermarket, but actually supermarkets make most of their money by selling shelf space to manufacturers. They are the real customers.

You might think you’re the customer when you buy a newspaper or watch the TV, but the media make their money by delivering viewers/readers to the advertisers. The advertisers are the customers.

Who is the customer of public transport? The user, paying their fare to travel? Or given that (in this state) the private operators make the bulk of their money from government subsidies, would it be the government?

Are the customers of the health insurance companies sick people, healthy people, the hospitals/medical industry, or the government who are subsidising them?

PS. Okay this is probably painting it a little one-sided… in each case, the end consumer is an essential part of the picture.

You have to feel some pity for the Australian morning daily papers. All this World Cup excitement, including a game last night won by Australia, but the lead times to get their newspaper onto peoples front lawns by breakfast time means they can’t report the results. They try and make up for it, but there’s only so many World Cup colour supplements one can handle.

Personally I’m nowhere near fanatical enough to tune in that late at night (knowing what havoc it would have the following day through lack of sleep). But there are those that do. One guy at work did the ultimate and flew to Germany for the month, without even having to book a ticket to see a game. That’s dedication.

There’s been talk recently of moving the AFL Grand Final from its Saturday afternoon slot to an evening one, apparently for the benefits of TV. My question is: what could they gain? It’s already a sell-out at the ground, and consistently the highest rating single TV programme of the year. I find it hard to believe they’d gain any more viewers or advertising dollars.

Meanwhile the ABC has finally announced the new series of Doctor Who will air in July, starting with the Christmas episode. Yep, “Christmas in July”. I wonder how long it took the promotional people to come up with that one, and more importantly, did they hold off on showing it specifically to gain that piss-weak tagline?

They don’t seem to have learnt yet that big audiences might be gained by jumping on the bandwagon of worldwide near-simultaneous broadcasts, and harnessing existing publicity. In the global village, I want to watch what my neighbours are watching.

Did they really delay broadcasting Doctor Who (a show which is mainstream enough to be the subject of many downloads on what’s becoming known as Channel BT, and regularly gets mentions in popular newspapers such as MX) just so they could show Rocket Man in that timeslot first? All respect to Robson Green and the rest of the cast, but a cute premise, a setting in yet another UK village full of eccentrics, and an Elton John song for the theme tune don’t make a hit.

“In the mansion of life, we can’t all be the state bedroom. Someone’s gotta be the outside bog, and that’s you!” — Vince, in Pratt Outta Hell, by Ben Elton

I wonder how many people are happy with the job they’re in, and how many are just killing time/earning some bucks while they work towards something else? I don’t mean people who are progressing naturally through their chosen career, but are actively trying to switch.

What does the guy lugging expensive boutique soft-drinks into an exclusive cafe think of the clientele? Do people in service industries ever get envious of their (sometimes quite obviously) more wealthy customers? Or are they happy enough (provided their own wages are high enough) not to be living with the stress (past, during higher education, and present, in their jobs) those people might be burdened with?

Personally I’m pretty happy in my job, because the pay’s pretty good, the hours are flexible, I’m learning stuff, it continues to challenge me, and it’s not overflowing with red-tape. And I don’t really want to leave the technical sphere and go into management, which I know from past experience is Not Me.